“I guess I don’t have a ‘future’ plan,” I said to a friend on GChat. He inquired about my recent promotion at Context Optional and where I wanted to go from here.
“As long as everything is working, why lock yourself into a plan?” He responded.
He’s right, but it doesn’t alter the strange feeling I have in the pit of my stomach. I’m content, not complacent, but also not planning my next move. This is a first for me.
Sometimes, I think I’m still clinging onto this post-college mentality. The highly navigated lifestyle of a student: study for a test to get a good grade to get a diploma to get a good job. We know what material will be on the Final Exam so we know how to get a good grade. We know that we can drop the lowest grade on a paper. There are tangible milestones and clear instructions on how to reach them and as students, we’re measured against our ability to follow those instructions and reach those milestones, not necessarily by true knowledge or performance. We know what it takes to get that A.
But now, as professionals, we have to navigate how to reach milestones we don’t even know we want yet.
I’m finding myself constantly redefining the sense of progression. What does it truly mean to move forward? How do I know I’m succeeding? Where exactly is…forward?
20-somethings are frequently asked, “Where do you see yourself in five years? What do you want to be doing?” Every time I’m asked, I draw a blank. Do I see myself in San Francisco in five years? I don’t know. Do I see myself settled down with a family, a white picket fence and 2.5 kids? Maybe.
So, I respond, “Ya know, I’m really happy right now. I’m just going to keep working hard and doing what I’m doing until I’m no longer happy, and then I’ll reassess.”
And I get so frustrated. Why can’t we just work to be the best at what we’re doing right now? Everyone is so focused on the future, we forget to live in the moment, in the now. We’re often so caught up in the future and planning for a promotion or a raise or a family that the time spent right now, is just lost.
This mentality is retorted with, “What about a backup plan? What if what you’re doing currently doesn’t last?”
Trust me, I’ve thought of this. In reality, with the ever-changing world of social media, my job could potentially be at risk — every day. There’s no ring on my finger. Nothing is for certain.
“If you want to be audaciously successful, your safety net is your talent,” my friend replied. “You can take risks, not because you’re worried about losing, but because, fuck it, you’re good enough to find another path.”
It’s with this confidence and reassurance that I am able to be content and completely satisfied with the now.
I am fortunate enough work with some of the most brilliant people I’ve ever met. With their endless help and encouragement (and the encouragement of my family and friends, of course) I feel confident in everything I’ve accomplished and what I am capable of in the future.
Lauren 5 years ago would have said something similar, but also would have had an idea of how to get there. The difference between the path that’s navigated for you and the path you’ve navigated for yourself is that there aren’t clear instructions on how to get ahead, how to move forward. You have to figure it out on your own, trust in others who are leading you and learn to take a step back and check your gut.
“Worst case scenario, you’re still okay. Best case scenario, you’re setting up the rest of your life to be sick.”
Speaking of sick — drumroll please — I’m going to London! To say I’ve been blessed with opportunity is an understatement. Context Optional is sending me to London for a little over a week to meet with customers, potential customers and begin the opening of our UK office. I’ve never been to Europe, and I can’t wait! Don’t worry, there will be tons of photos taken and lots of writing and reflecting done on the 11 hour flight… eek. I’ll try my best to update my Lifecast as much as I can while I’m there so you all can follow along. 🙂
I’ll be off and living 8 hours in the future for the next week.
Wish me luck!
I love the “Lauren 5 years ago…” paragraph. It is like one of those quotes you read on those inspirational quote websites. It is hard to live in the now, but sometimes it is important to just sit back and let fate take us where we are meant to go. Every decision leads us on a path and until we take that path, the future is uncertain. Oh by the way – Congrats on your promotion. That is so exciting! and HAVE FUN IN LONDON!! I love Europe.
Thanks, Caryn 🙂 It is SUPER hard to live in the now. I’m afraid if I don’t, even for a little while, it’ll all be over before I had a chance to really see any of it.
I’m so excited and nervous and overwhelmed about London but I’m sure it will be fabulous! Will tell you all about it!
a week in London!? SWEEEEEET. 🙂 congrats on your promotion.
I know! I can’t wait! Don’t worry, I’ll post a lot 🙂 And thanks for the congrats! Big things are happening around here it seems.
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Just discovered your blog and have to say, I love this post! 🙂 Have a great time in London! I spent a long weekend there a few years ago and completely fell in love with the city!
Yay! I love new readers! THANK YOU for leaving a comment 🙂
I’m so excited for London. I’ll make sure to post lots of photos!
Dear Future LaurenA,
Are there flying cars?
Sincerely,
Your Bestie
I will be sure to let you know 🙂
I AM SO THERE. Well, recently got there – to this place of loving and living in the now. I’ve been spending a lot of time this year wondering why I haven’t gotten farther. Farther than WHAT? By whose standards? I’m with you. Life is good, right now. Also, CONGRATS ON LONDON! That’s amazing!
It’s so hard not to get caught up in the idea that we can always be doing MORE. I’m so guilty of that, too! But, I’m learning (or at least trying to learn) how to accept where I’m at and that it just might be good enough 🙂
Yay for London! A whole week?! That’s amazing!
And I know what you mean about living for the future and forgetting to live for the now. I’m a planner by nature and often forget that RIGHT NOW is excellent and that if I don’t take a breath to enjoy it right now, I’ll regret it later.
Yay for London! It was such a great experience. Can’t wait to get all my photos ready 🙂
I’m a HUGE planner, too. I swear I have things planned a year in advance. But sometimes, it’s nice to have NO plans and just BE. That’s what I’m shooting for now.
Great post! Living in the now is definitely something I have to practice more.
Congrats on your week in London!
Thanks! You keep practicing and let me know how it goes. I’m still struggling, but getting better! 🙂