I read an article courtesy of my beautifully successful friend Jamie that really pissed me off.

Here’s the synopsis: In the book Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough, Lori Gottlieb argues that if a hyper-educated, ambitious woman is still single after age 35, it’s because she’s too picky. According to Gottlieb, these aging go-getters are sans man because they have “unconscious husband-shopping” checklists a mile long. When they were younger, these women rejected men for having red hair or saying the word awesome too much. Now they are paying for their excessive youthful pride: Their marital prospects—and their eggs—have dried up. To avoid this trap, she posits, women in their late 20s and early 30s should settle for the “8,” instead of waiting around for the “10.”

Settle? Settle?

Let me preface this by saying that I have not read the book, however, I have read several reviews that summarize the contents pretty much the same way: women are too picky and should settle for someone that’s good enough instead of holding out for the perfect guy they deserve. To be honest, I’m not sure I could get through the entire book without wanting to throw it out the window.

First of all, I think there is a very small percentage of women who actually stop dating someone because their hair is red or they say the word “awesome” to much. To say that’s the majority of women is outlandish. Of course, a woman who is really seeking out a life partner has standards (or at least they should). I know what I want, I know what I deserve, I know what I’m looking for, and there are certain things I am just not willing to compromise on. Suggesting that I must compromise those things in order to be with someone, anyone, is unfair. I would rather be alone than be with someone that doesn’t offer me what I know I deserve.

Relationships take compromise. I understand that. But you should never compromise so much that you are losing what you rightfully deserve and want. You should never settle. Ever.

Marriage is not a fix for everything. It won’t just automatically make you happy. In fact, if you marry the wrong person, it will inevitably make you incredibly unhappy. Some people are happier not being married at all.

I work in an office mostly comprised of late 20s to early 30s men and women. The majority of the men in our office are married. However, the majority of the women in the office are not. Gottlieb suggests that there is something wrong with a 30-40 year-old woman that is not married. What if you’re doing other things in your life that are making you happy? What if you are happy with your career? Your friends? Your family? Marriage doesn’t make everyone happy and it shouldn’t be assumed to do so. Especially when in involves settling for less in order to achieve this “happiness.”

In my opinion (and Jamie’s as well), when you start to settle in one area of your life, that mentality will expand into other areas. What is that saying about us? That we don’t go for what we want? For what we deserve? We just find some guy that is somewhat nice and say, “ok, that’s fine, you’ll do”? No. You go after what you want and deserve no matter what. In all aspects of your life.

This brings me to another article I read from the New York Times earlier this week (and a conversation I had with a person I used to date). When talking about why our dating never turned into anything more, one of his excuses was that he’s “not compatible with someone who makes their job their life.” Coincidentally enough, I came across this article the day after this conversation. The article expresses how Americans 30 to 44 years old is the first generation in which more women than men have college degrees. Women’s earnings have been increasing faster than men’s since the 1970s. And men are intimidated. They think you’re high-maintenance if you look like you don’t need anyone to take care of you. It’s intimidating for men to interact with smart women who possibly make more money than they do. They feel inferior. It’s a gender role reversal that should have (obviously) never existed in the first place. But, now that it does, women are having a hard time overcoming it. So, what are we supposed to do? Dumb ourselves down? Pretend we’re not smart, driven and capable? I think not. We’ve all worked really hard to turn around the female reputation in the workplace. There’s no turning back now.

I am an incredibly independent person. I am self-sufficient. I am successful. I am happy. Do I think that it’s going to be hard to find a man with the same ideals and goals as I have and that will respect and even appreciate my work ethic? Yes. Will I settle for someone who doesn’t? No.

As the New Year approaches, it seems as though it’s a theme in the blogosphere to be writing about their New Year resolutions. Yes… I want to join a gym, lose 20 pounds, be a better person, blah blah blah. But let’s be real here for a second.

My 2009 was a whirlwind. To say the least.

I turned 22, which doesn’t seem like a big deal, but I suddenly wasn’t 21 anymore. I wasn’t “just able to drink” anymore. It was really the first Birthday that I felt older. Don’t laugh. I know I’m young and I have the whole world ahead of me, but it was an interesting feeling.

My second semester senior year (spring of 2009) I became the Editor-in-chief of the CU Newspaper. This was such an incredible experience and literally shaped my knowledge as I graduated in May. I learned so much about journalism, teaching, leadership, friendship, motivation, inspiration, dedication, some other “tions” that I don’t even know yet, and most of all, it helped me learn about myself and the kind of person and work ethic I have developed over the years.

I graduated college. It’s weird to say, but I knew I was going to graduate when I started my freshman year at CU. But, it was amazing and somewhat surprising that graduation day had actually arrived. I did it. I studied hard and graduated from the School of Journalism and Mass Communication at CU. You can see a collection of memories throughout my college career here.

My brother graduated from high school. This amazes me. Not because I didn’t think he could do it, but because my little (younger – since he’s technically bigger than me) was going to be a college student. He was going to take my place as a CU Buffalo. And I know college boys…I wasn’t ready for him to be one of those.

I got a job two months after I graduated college. Despite most everyone’s pessimism when it came to me applying for jobs, I landed not one, but two jobs. One of which happened to be my dream job that I took without a second thought. I did it. I created my reality and began the journey to make my dreams come true.

I moved to San Francisco. After accepting my dream job at Context Optional, I had two weeks to pack my stuff, find a place to live in San Francisco, sign a lease, get keys, and move all of my belongings over 1200 miles away from where I grew up. As you know, this move was the biggest change in my life. Ever. You can read about it: Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3.

I was the Maid of Honor at my best friend’s wedding. Holy hell was that weird. I never thought I would be old enough when marriage was actually acceptable and not deemed “inappropriate.” Being the Maid of Honor require a lot of work – from planning a Bachellorette Party to giving wedding toasts, it was definitely an incredible experience. And I couldn’t be happier for my best friend in the world.

My mom sold our childhood house. This was especially challenging for me as I was in San Francisco and was unable to give my house a proper goodbye. There were so many memories made within the walls of that house that it was hard to let it go. But, in the end, it was the best decision for my mom and that’s what matters.

I went on my first business trip. This was an incredible learning experience for me. Whilst working primarily within the social sphere, I feared I had lost my ability to interact face-to-face. This business trip taught me how to listen, consider and respond while in the midst of a fast paced work environment. I have fine-tuned my brainstorming skills and ability to convey ideas in person and would encourage any of you other “social nerds” to get out there and do the same.

I travelled out of the country to Jamaica. After my first six months in the working world, and after picking up my whole life and moving to a city where I knew no one, it was definitely nice to get away to paradise for a week.

As you can see, whirlwind doesn’t even begin to describe the year I’ve had. But it’s been amazing. I’ve accomplished some of my biggest goals and when I sit down and think about 2010 and what the future holds for me, I can’t help but smile and think, “I don’t know how 2010 can be any better than 2009.”

It may seem as though I have been neglecting you, but, like everyone else in the home-stretch of Q4, I’ve been so busy. In fact, I went on my first business trip! I feel so “grown-up” saying it, and I felt even more “grown-up” getting on a plane, staying in a hotel, and going to meetings with clients for two days.

I went to Los Angeles, Calif. with my supervisor to meet with one of our big clients. We met to a) meet face to face for the first time (for me at least), b) discuss progress from the past month we’ve been working with them and c) discuss social media plans for 2010.

Sidenote: Holy crap it’s almost 2010.

Anyway.

Let me just say, we came up with some awesome ideas while locked up in a conference room for eight hours each day. We have now mapped out an entire social media plan for the first half of 2010; complete with promotions, execution plans, timelines and prizes. I’m stoked.

It was an incredible learning experience for me. Not only was I in meetings all day long with VPs and Directors, I was also managing other clients during some (rare) difficulties. I learned about the inner-workings of this company and now have a better understanding of the kinds of things they do and the detailed process in which they do them.

But what I learned form the most, was my supervisor. He. Is. Awesome. You see, my vision of what agencies do goes a little like this:

“I’m preparing for a business trip. It’s with this client and this is what they want and this is my plan and this is how I’m going to execute it. Period.”

However, with my supervisor, this wasn’t the case. I have no idea how much he prepared for this business trip. I know we prepared a presentation (that we didn’t even present), but as far as I know, that’s about it. Funny thing is, he didn’t need to prepare. He has an incredible understanding of business and how business should be. Instead of walking into a meeting with predisposed plans and predetermined methods, he walked in to the meeting with an open mind. Want to know the craziest part? He listened. Our company actually listened! We listened to what the client had to say. My supervisor asked questions that were thought provoking and incited the client to describe (in detail) their goals, how they see social media contributing to their personal job and how we, Context Optional, could help them achieve their goals. Now, these goals varied depending on each individual job, but that didn’t matter. My supervisor continued to listen and respond no matter what the goal was. From there, we devised plans that incorporated everyone’s goals and (hypothetically) achieved them. It was incredible to watch and be a part of.

Now, you may be asking yourself why I put the word listen in italics each time it was mentioned. That’s because people don’t listen anymore. I don’t know whether it’s because they’re preoccupied, distracted, careless, or all of the above, but people don’t listen. Therefore, they don’t respond properly. They don’t succeed with clients because they don’t make them happy because they don’t listen.

Context Optional listens. And I am so lucky to be a part of that. I am so exited to see all of our big ideas, pitched to head-honchos, come alive.

Twitter recently announced lists, an easy solution for adding a group of your brand’s favorite to your Twitter page.  Lists are like bookmarks on your browser, or a blogroll on your blog, but for your brand on Twitter allow you bring relevant brand related content to your Twitter page.

Here are five ways your brand can benefit from Twitter Lists:

1. Follow Other Brands or People in Your Industry

It can be hard to navigate the vastness of Twitter.  Twitter Lists allow you to group users that are important for you to watch.  Well crafted lists help your firm build credibility among those in your industry as well as make it easy to @reply and retweet industry peers by following them in the same place.

2. Recognize or Watch Valued Customers

Use Twitter lists to connect with your customers.  By creating a List of your customers, it’s very easy to follow the customers you care most about.  Lists make it easier to send out tweets or messages to the designated list members, which is a great way to recognize important tweeters to your brand. If you’re concerned about listing your customers on a public forum, you can also keep that list private and just refer to it yourself.

3. Create an Employee List

Many times brands create Twitter accounts that then appear to be run by “robots.”  Customers value knowing who they are talking to. A Twitter List that highlights the Twitter accounts of your employees allows customers to reach out to representatives that might cater to their needs more precisely than if they contacted the master account.  Include official company accounts, employees who tweet for your company, and any personal accounts that employees wish to share as well.

4. Showcase Experience

Brands can use Twitter Lists to showcase with whom your company has worked and the kind of work done. This is a valuable way for other users to see what you’ve been up to and how you stay connected.

5. Increase Your Following

By using and promoting your Twitter Lists you can drastically increase your following. Think about it this way, you’re including industry specialists, clients, employees, etc. in your Twitter Lists – chances are, if you’re this involved, you’ll get added to lists as well. It’s a “snowball” effect and before you know it, you will have been completely infiltrated into the Twitter world. Being added to a Twitter list allows users who may not be following you to see your tweets. This increases your visibility and puts your brand out there so others can follow you.

Check out Context Optional’s Twitter Lists!

I don’t think I ever truly understood this saying/excuse/line before. Until now.

It’s true. And it’s awesome.

I know I’ve said it before, but my job is amazing – and no, I’m not just writing this because some of my coworkers read my blog. I’m writing this because, every day, no matter how stressed out or overwhelmed the “real world” may be, I feel like the luckiest damn girl in the world.

I’ve always had a great work ethic. Even when I worked in various restaurants and bars throughout high school and college, I was always the one going above and beyond. I’ve always believed that you only get places if you work for them. Nothing is going to fall into your lap.

But, I have never had as much motivation to work hard as I do now. I am constantly given more and more responsibility at work. Many people might run scared from that – at the slightest sight of adversity. But me? I like a challenge. And while, at times, this week I wanted to throw my laptop off the 14^th floor of my office building, I truly and whole-heartedly love being so busy. Of course, it helps a little bit that I couldn’t have found a dreamier dream job. This job and I, just fit.

I’m dipping my toes in so many puddles and learning more and more each day. I am in a constant state of learning. I love it.

Who knew, at 22, that I would be exactly where I want to be?

With all the talk of Twitter and Facebook slowly taking over the world, we’ve all seemed to forget about MySpace. Many of us don’t even equate MySpace with social networking as we once did. It seems as though MySpace is now just a place for musicians and advertisements.

During the past six months, MySpace activity has dropped significantly. According to Mashable.com, MySpace’s U.S. traffic dropped from 55.6 million unique visitors in August to 50.2 million in September. Wow. That’s more than five million users in one month.

MySpace is in a downward, accelerating spiral. It’s losing millions and millions of dollars for News Corp., not to mention three executives and countless staff layoffs the past few months. MySpace is losing users like, whoa.

Full article

It was recently announced that Facebook is making significant changes in the ways application developers have access to Facebook user data. According to PCWorld and InsideFacebook, Facebook is changing the privacy features over the next year as a result of a meeting with the Canadian government. The meeting included recommendations from Canada regarding the distribution and acquiring of information by Facebook applications. In response, Facebook will increase the publicity of its privacy features and tighten privacy controls. So, how does this affect application developers?

Full article

Can you believe it??

Talk about time flying.. I have officially been in San Francisco one month. Today. I can’t believe it.

It some aspects, it feels like I’ve been here forever; in others, only a few days. Nonetheless, it has been one whole month of me living in the city.

And I’m loving it.

As most of you know, I have had many great experiences here so far. I have explored some of San Francisco’s many “districts,” been to restaurants, bars, clubs, and, of course, plenty of stores. I have had the time of my life. It feels like the “vacation mood” is almost over.

I never thought I would feel settled here. I hoped, but wasn’t sure whether I’d be able to call my little studio, “home.” But, tonight, I had a close friend over after dinner (a friend from Colorado that recently moved to Berkeley) and was asked by her, “So, do you consider this home yet?” And without hesitation, I said, “Yes.”

How I know I’m settled:

I give tourists directions
I get annoyed by all the tourists
I have made friends with the doorman of the hotel I walk past every day to work
I get to skip the line at East Side West because they “know me”
I recommend restaurants and know where to take people
I have mastered my San Francisco style
I found a doctor
I called San Francisco “My City”
I complain about the weather
I’ve acknowledged San Francisco’s “microclimates”
I am used to the homeless population
I’ve been harassed by people trying to overturn Prop 8
Green Peace people don’t scare me (ok, maybe a little)
I have a nail lady
I’ve gone to a drug store nearby and bought essentials
I check out hotels for my friends and family to stay in when they come to visit
I have a route to work
I follow a daily routine (sometimes)
The guy at the flower cart recognizes me
I made appointments at the Apple store
I’ve gotten used to the city noise and can no longer sleep without it
I just plain ‘ol love it more and more every day

All this in just one month. 30 days out of my life – starting my new life. I can’t wait for what the next months will bring.

I survived my first week in the big city.

Actually, I more than survived it. I couldn’t be happier with my decision to follow my dreams to California. And I certainly feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

My job is amazing. It doesn’t feel like I just started; it feels like I’ve been there for months. I dove right in, head first, and I love it. The people are awesome, I’m doing exactly what I want to be doing, and I’m learning a ton. It’s perfection.

My apartment is finally unpacked and fully furnished. It turned out how I wanted it to turn out – my dad calls in “Urban Chic.” And he’s right. I had the chance to design a brand new apartment. I had a clean slate, and with the help of my trusty interior designer, my own instinct, and what my mom and I talked about the week before I moved in, I have sufficiently made the most out of my little studio.

I have lots of exploring to do, but that will all come in time.

I’m here. Now I must live and love my life.

(Now we will resume our regularly scheduled programming and I’ll be posting more about issues than myself - it’s been fun sharing this milestone with you.)

So, my stuff doesn’t fit. I moved from a two story, two bedroom, one and a half bathroom, condo to a studio. Erk.

The studio is beautiful and it’s going to be absolutely perfect for me. I just have too much stuff. Evidently I had my binge, and now I must purge.

What better time than now? Now is my opportunity to clean out my old life and begin my new one. Get rid of all the junk and only keep what I love. This is true for all facets of my move – people, things, memories. Now is my chance to truly begin again.

For example, I’m a 415 girl now. And I was able to pick the 303/720 friends that I wanted to come with me. It’s a great feeling to begin with only the people you love.

I recycled my last two boxes this morning – now I just need to find a DVD holder for my 72 DVDs (didn’t realize my collection had grown so much!) and wait for my couch and dining set to be delivered next week, then my apartment will be complete.

My job officially starts on Monday. I can’t wait. Many people are asking me what I’m doing – I am the Community Genius for Context Optional , a social marketing company. I will be sure to keep you all posted as I figure out exactly what I’ll be doing. Of course, I cannot divulge the deep, dark secrets of the social marketing world, but I will let you know as much as I can.

So far, so good in the City by the Bay!